What happens to the child after the family abduction?

In our soon 19 years experience in dealing with all types of Parental Abductions in every corner of the world, we have seen and heard it all. Firstly, lets make it clear as we have in the past, we care not for the mother or father, we care for the innocent children who are the real victims and stuck between two parents broken relationships.


The answer to ‘what happens to the child after the abduction’ is not an easy or straight forward one. Every single case is different even if the children are abducted to and from the same countries as others. There are so many different aspects in each case that effects children in different ways. There is also the individual children involved. How each child deals with being abducted or kidnapped by family members is tremendously different in every child.

Our job at CARI Child Abduction Recovery International is not only to assist in bringing illegally abducted children home safe and well to their habitual residence, it’s also assisting in the legal minefield clients face throughout the nightmare. We also provide after care and assist both our clients and children long after we get them home. The truth is no one besides our clients understand what we do and how we do things. This industry is full of so many myths. Experienced law firms know all to well once they have exhausted all legal avenues available, with all legal papers in place, the only way to get the kids physically home, is with CARI.

The amount of jobs we have completed just to ‘legally’ enforce The Hague Convention rulings would shock you. Some including the likes of charity, ‘Reunite International’ often tell parents to avoid Recovery organisations and this is why their cases will drag on for years and years with no results. That’s why parents get fed up and come to us. Numerous of our clients can confirm this and the fact they force parents into useless mediation at a cost. So many cases can easily be completed if all legal avenues have been carried out. It’s true however, you must be careful who you seek help from due to the amount of frauds searching for a quick dollar, but that also includes dodgy lawyers who only see dollar signs over a long period of time.

The lawyers on Reunites website only need to pay an annual fee to get their details on the list. No vetting needed. Parent automatically assume they are experienced and put their trust in them due to being on such a website. We can assure you looking at the list and carrying out research, so many are not experienced in IPCA cases. Do not be scared to ask Lawyers to prove their experience in IPCA. Ask to speak to past clients they have helped. Time is critical in IPCA.

Once we take on a case, our operatives are deeply involved with our clients from day one and go through the good and bad days they have. It’s a emotional roller coaster ride full of every emotional aspect you can imagine. Unless you have had your child kidnapped you don’t understand how it feels. We are not only recovery specialists, we are self made psychologist and legal advisers, who have worked with and continue to work with so many qualified lawyers and psychologist from around the world. We see first hand the devastation some children suffer from due to things like PAS Parental Alienation Syndrome, which is almost attached to every Parental Abduction case.

It’s very disappointing to continue to see and read over social media false and misleading articles by some who have no idea on this extremely important subject. When will some people understand these are children’s lives we are talking about here and not just another statistic. Statistics by the way no Government holds. People quote wrong statistics all the time. The truth is there are no accurate statistics in IPCA. The UK FCO do not even know or keep figures on how many UK children are abducted out of the UK each year. They base their pathetic statistics on how many applications are received by UK Embassies in foreign countries!!! Freedom of information searches prove just this. So when the HCCH- Hague Convention puts out statistics it’s all rubbish, not real and only for show.

The other reality of IPCA is that more and more victim parents do not even bother reporting their children through the official channels. This is for two reasons, for religious reasons they are a shamed or family rules are to keep everything internal and because more and more victim parents are realizing that reporting your child through the pathetic Hague Convention is useless. The Hague Convention is a complete joke… facts not fiction. If you see statistics that show a drop in IPCA cases you can bet your bottom dollar it’s due to more and more parents not reporting it. It’s why CARI Child Abduction Recovery International can not keep up with the work load we face. If we have had a constant waiting period for new clients who need help, there is a problem.  The governments, Reunite and lawyers know this, but will have you believe something else.

We are even seeing more parents who have been through an abduction believe they can then start advising others in similar situations. As we stated even abduction case that involve the same countries are very different due to the different type of people involved and how things are in that case. Offering support is always great and needed but you can not become an expert and advice others just because you have been through a case of IPCA – International Parental Child Abduction. Some parents are even asking other victim parents for money for advice. We harp on it often, but it’s so vital parents are given the correct information on all options available to them, not just hearing from one parent they met on one of the hundreds of Parental Abduction Facebook pages or groups. This we find happening far too often now and it does effect the children and the outcome of them getting home. The wrong advice or having the wrong people involved in your case including inexperienced lawyers (and trust us there are more inexperienced qualified lawyers out there, then there are experienced in the IPCA field), will without doubt cost you valuable time and a lot of money, both of which left behind parents can not afford to loose.

We have now recovered over 200 children safely back home to their habitual residence and we can honestly state they are all doing extremely well in all aspects of their lives. Do not be fooled by others stating to recover your child will cause that child psychological damage…..a load of horse crap. Just speak to all our past clients and the older children we have returned safely. CARI Child Abduction Recovery International believes it’s paramount that our clients and returned children receive support and guidance once back home. There must be programs in place by Governments in order to help, this includes funding. Some children when they first returned home take a little slower then others to adjust, but this is due to the individual circumstances and possible trauma they were living in while on the run in a foreign country and or the depth of alienation received by the kidnapping parent and their family. Most of the children we help return home have lived like fugitives on the run all victims of alienation. No schooling, no medical and isolated from locals and children. This is not a life for any child to grow up in. Remember a child abducted by a parent is not a safe child.

Take young Morgan Carr who was kidnapped and dumped as a baby in Laos from the UK by his mother and within a week of doing so, traveled to the United States to meet her new boyfriend. Absolutely no one would help this poor child including the pathetic UK FCO (Foreign Commonwealth Office) who knew exactly what Morgan was going through. No recovery had ever been conducted or attempted before in Laos, many stating it was too dangerous to get Morgan out. Countless visits to the UK Embassy in Laos, proved just how unwilling Embassies are in IPCA cases. Reality check….. Embassies are for show only, to lick the asses of their host country. When our team sat in the Ambassadors vehicle in Laos with the father of Morgan, the deputy Ambassador to the UK Embassy turned to the father and winked his eye at our team, as he said, “There is only one way you will ever see you son again and get him home.” You see professional organisations like CARI are needed, regardless of what pencil pushers and some charities state to parents.

Morgan’s case was one of the worst cases of abuse we have seen. If we did not help Morgan get out of Laos and back to civilization to be treated medically and mentally before he was sold on the black market (yes we acted quickly as we had received information from locals Morgan was going to be sold to traffickers so the family could have money), he would simply not be alive today. We will never forget taking Morgan through Bangkok airport after we recovered him safely across the Mekong river into Thailand. The eyes on Morgan was unbelievable. The only way to describe him was a cave boy frozen millions of years ago seeing civilization for the first time. He was so badly malnourished and neglected it was horrible to see.


In Morgan’s case it took time and a lot of patients by his loving father and family back in the UK to get Morgan on the right track. He is still suffering from trauma caused by his treatment in Laos but the family are working on it. School was a major problem for Morgan and the fact of interacting with other children, he found tough. This was due to how he lived in Laos. Financially struggling as well as the years fighting to bring his son home through useless and corrupt courts, took a massive toll on Gordon Carr. Facing wall after wall to get his son home, being ignored time and time again only to be faced with the on going struggle of helping his son resettle and adapt to civilization back home. Gordon thought his fight was over once his son was back on UK soil…. unfortunately he was so wrong.

Not one bit of assistance from anyone in the UK, nothing from the UK FCO except a ‘welcome home’. The government funded charity ‘Reunite’ ignored Gordon and his son as they have so many other UK parents once the children are home. Giving a list of Lawyers, pushing parents into unrealistic mediation and wishing you good luck is not support, it’s fake bullshit. Yes, we will call it how it is because no on else will. Where is the funding given to these so called IPCA charities? Why isn’t funding available for these parents returning their children home to assist in the child’s resettlement including any health issues they may have suffered?

It’s appalling to see young Morgan and other children being neglected even on their home soil. Our experience caused us to focus on what needed to be done to help Moregan and ignore the hypocrisy and heartlessness of the government’s position. The mighty UK who has charities and all the other bells and whistles that scream against IPCA, but it’s all for show. The truth is none of them care about the children. It’s about promoting themselves over social media and in the International communities eyes, as the all mighty, but couldn’t give two tosses about the children. Morgan’s case and so many other UK children we have returned home are no different. Just speak to our clients and past clients to hear the truth about their experiences.

We are very happy to state that Morgan is doing extremely well and even wants to go to school on weekends now. We believe with support Morgan could have resettled a lot quicker. He has and continues to receive great results in school and has been awarded numerous class awards. All a result of his loving father and family supporting Morgan throughout everything. Morgan is growing into a lovely young man who wants nothing to do with his kidnapping mother. Morgan’s father continues to encourage him to have a relationship with his mother, but as we always say, children are not dumb and they understand exactly what kidnapping parents do. In many cases (not all) kidnapped children will resent the kidnapping parent for a long time to come.


CARI – Child Abduction Recovery International are the only ones speaking out with the truth. Others know but sit back and watch as more and more parents suffer. Weekly parents contact us in all different stages of their abduction case and it’s the same old message we get about them receiving help….. ZERO. This is why so many left behind parents mistakenly turn to Social Media to start researching and then come across all types of so called bogus experts. We understand there is no where to turn to and information is scarce, but you must be vitally careful of wrong information, frauds and scammers after a quick buck at your child’s expense.

The shocking truth is there is absolutely ZERO support for parents and children before, during and once children have returned home. It’s appalling to even think that this can even happen in 2019, and it’s happening in all Western countries as well, Australia, United States, UK, France, Sweden, Canada….. all the same, ZERO support. This is a major problem that simply will not go away until Governments step up to the plate and acknowledge the extent of how bad IPCA is.

We have met in person with the Australian DFAT (Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade) and UK FCO, and discussed IPCA and what they can do better to assist Australian and UK parents and their children. The UK FCO’s pencil pushing muppets shitty response to the question of, why is there no support for children returning home, “It’s not our responsibility once they return home to the UK”…..

This statement alone even after discussing Morgan’s case with them in details, which they already knew, clearly highlights the blatant ignorance and neglect Governments have towards IPCA and its real victims… the children.


(Morgan Christmas 2018)


If you have any questions or concerns regarding International Parental Child Abduction feel free to contact CARI Child Abduction Recovery International 24/7. We are always available at info@childabductionrecovery.com or by calling our CEO Adam Whittington directly +46 707385598

We don’t just talk, we actually recover children!